The Restaurants of Palestine
AAA 
Family food. Best ribeye in town.
Catfish King
Simply the place to go for aficianados of the whiskered
bottom-feeder. Fried catfish, grilled catfish, catfish gumbo.
Salad bar. A very fine blackberry cobbler on a good night - and if
you order it ala mode your waitress will be glad to take it
over to the soft ice cream machine and hose it down.
Chang's
For a Chinese restaurant in a town with no appreciable Chinese
population, Cheng's is not that bad. Forget the menu, ask them what's
good. The cook makes a nice dish from dried tofu, they usually have a
few Chinese vegetables, and if you call in advance they can steam a
fish.
Chip's Burger Village
The usual burgers and fries, along with tasty shakes made from Blue
Bell ice cream.
Dairy Queen
Blizzards, a major part of our diet.
One morning we had a rare treat at the Dairy Queen. Unbeknownst to
our Dairy Queen representative, the soft ice cream machine had not yet
come down to operating temperature. You can't imagine what happened
when she pulled that handle.
El Toro
Tex-mex. But more importantly, the only restaurant in town that
serves liquor. You can get margaritas that resemble Slushies, but
they're not bad.
Gazebo
The restaurant in the Day's Inn. Pretty much what you'd expect.
Golden Corral
A steak house, along the lines of a Sizzler, but avoid the steaks.
Best salad bar in town, which unfortunately is not saying much, but
you can catch up on your veggies here.
Lobo's Little Mexico
More tex-mex. The prices are very low, and the portions are very
large. Our resident expert on tacos al carbon reports they are better
here than at El Toro. But our many experts on booze note that there
isn't any at Lobo's. Not even beer.
McGlaughlin's (SP?)
Beer. If you need more solid refreshment, they'll sell you a raw slab
of beef and point you at the grill in the back yard where you are
welcome to char it as needed. There are also baked potatoes.
Mazzio's
Italian chain food. Worst salad bar in town, but better than no salad
bar. A very nice collection of video games, many of which work, and
they give you tokens with your meal. If you have been appalled by
what children have been watching on TV, you should see these video
games.
Pitt Grill
Frank Orrall has said of Texan restaurants that they offer "mediocre
food, spitefully prepared and served with indifference." This
perfectly captures the unique ambience of the Pitt Grill. Open 24
hours, so you can enjoy greasy food served by rude waitresses at any
hour of the day. Try the pecan waffles, which sometimes contain
pecans. Or for a real treat, order the home fries "scattered,
smothered, and covered," which means they add greasy fried onions and
velveeta, and then cover the whole thing with cream gravy.
Shep's Barbeque
Best barbeque in Palestine. In fact, this is the best barbeque on the
planet. The side dishes are maybe not so great, but the ribs, chopped
beef, hot links, and chicken are to die for. Each meal will take at
least a year off your life.
Sonic Burger
Burgers. Not good. Extruded shakes. If you decide to go here
anyhow, you need to be familiar with a local custom. They serve you
at your car. Do not attempt to enter Sonic Burger on foot, it gets
them very upset.
Texas Burger
For a burger joint, Texas Burger has some interesting variety.
Besides the usual burgers, fries, and onion rings, you can get some
fine shakes made from genuine Blue Bell ice cream. And veggie
burgers. And for the adventurous, the emu burger. Made from genuine
emu. "The other red meat." No, I'm not kidding.
Mardi Gras
This young upstart of a restaraunt (new as of summer '96) is
still working out the bugs but certainly gets an "A" for
trying to be different. Initially the wide variety of offerings
on the menu is impressive with selections ranging from
crawfish etendu to the standard fried catfish. Unfortunately
the promise is better than the delivery though and the mushiness
of all the dishes makes you wish you were the lucky guy
who didn't get served. Oh, and avoid the corn ... it
is the plague!
Updated 14 August 1996